How I put my Trust in God, and WON!

Panic Attacks

The Most Probable Outcome of a Panic Attack,
while in the air, 30m above the ground

it’s death!

I started having panic attacks it’s been 2-3 years maybe.
But the last one, from 1 year ago, shook me the most.

Every time a panic attack started, I had to have contact with the ground (hands, feet, kneeling); it calmed me down.

But 1 year ago I took a ride with the Chairlift, with a group of friends. I didn’t realize until the moment I stopped feeling the ground under my feet: I was in the air, it was too late to back down. The panic attack started.

Increase in intensity

As we were moving towards the top of the hill the panic attack increased in intensity. We were 4 people on the chairlift. I didn’t say anything. My heart started pounding. I felt like the situation was getting out of control.

I couldn’t control myself anymore.

I literally saw my death. I told myself: this is it!

Looking for solutions

I remembered that I had a sedative drug (Extraveral) in my pocket; I carried it with me in case a new attack occurred. I had talked to my uncle before about these panic attacks and he had advised me.

I took 2 pills: no effect. The attack was too strong compared to the sedative.

The cherry on top

The girl next to me says:
(without having any idea what is happening to me):

“There was an article in the newspaper the other day; a girl panicked on the chairlift and jumped from about 20m and fractured her spine. She was paralyzed for life.”

I looked at this friend of mine, shocked of what I just heard… and felt a shiver down my spine.

I didn’t say anything…

And in that moment of despair, I raised my eyes towards the sky.

I put my WHOLE TRUST in GOD

Not 20%, not 50%, the whole of it: 100%.

And I said to myself: If God wants me dead today, I die.

This is it.

So I took a fixed point in the sky and pictured God, and right next to HIM, the Holy Mother.

Staring at that fixed point in the sky, with that Holy image in my mind,
I began to hear my heart beat,

then I heard my breathing,

then I slowly entered a state of calm.

20m before we reached the top of the mountain

still chasm below us. The chairlift stops out of the blue.

The same friend of mine, NOW STARTED TO PANIC.

I put my hand on her shoulder and said: calm down!
In a few minutes the chairlift resumed its journey and in a short time we reached the top of the mountain.

Belvedere: view over the City

I couldn’t enjoy the view. I was still shaken: I was shaking.

I looked down the mountain and said to myself:

1/ I either go down the mountain on foot – which was not ideal, we were part of a group, we had to return in the same formation

2/ or I go through another 20 minutes of hell…

Hell Part 2: for 20 more minutes

The panic attack re-started.

Same intensity: huge

I followed the same Protocol: the look up in the sky, staring at a fixed point: picturing God and Mother Mary.

I got down safely

I was a different person.

A Whole New Level

Very few things scare me ever since. I was once prepared to die.

Later on that day

there’s this song that I heard, randomly:

I will lift up my eyes to heaven, from where my help will come

Saved by God’s Grace!

[ we are small in our worlds, while our worlds are already small… ]

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